To breach or not to breach.  Cheese-factor aside, that’s seriously all that I’ve been thinking about for the past couple of days since I was offered the job of a lifetime by Breacher.  Well, that and his Hawaiian-themed “I don’t give a damn” ensemble.  That… I will never allow myself to forget.

Still, could I really become Breacher 2.0?  Look at all the positives: I’d be the most fearsome badass across all 53 Earths, I’d get to see Gypsy ALL the dang time, and I’d finally fulfill my lifelong dream of dressing like Neo from The Matrix all day, err day.

This offer may check off all the boxes for my #lifegoals, but I do need more time to process it.  In the meantime, I need a serious distraction to take my mind off of it.  No, I’m not talking about another 12-hour “Fortnite” gameplay marathon at Casa de Ramon.  I need to have responsible adult Cisco this time.

As my luck would have it, Iris just asked me to perform some major upgrades on her recently dusted-off laptop.  This thing is so old.  Seriously! I think it still uses floppy disks.  Or, at the very least, it was built before Obama’s first term (keep in mind, that’s like two “Spiderman” reboots ago!  ANCIENT I tell you!)  

Iris refuses to let go of that laptop.  I even offered to vaporize it and build her a new one, but she kept telling me about it having some sentimental value or something.  So, I’ll swallow my techie pride and do it.  Because I’m a good frackin friend and it’s a distraction from the job offer.  CRAP.  Now, I’m thinking about it again…